Tokyo Ghoul Episode 1: Tragedy

No this is not an April Fools joke. Tokyo Ghoul is on Toonami, I’m actually fucking recapping it, and the Your Pretty Face is Going to Hell recaps are still on hiatus (to those that care, sorry)

So why is that? Why is this the first post from me since I think Phantom Blood? Well, something that I think everyone reading this can relate to: school biting me in the ass! Since no one else wanted to do the recaps (or at the very least obtain the Swim Squad rights to do so), I decided to step up and accept the challenge: recap what could possibly be one of Toonami’s worst shows since it’s revival. Maybe not Dimension W levels of boredom or Akame Ga Kill levels of edgy (some would disagree) or Sword Art Online II’s levels of being Sword Art Online. But maybe it won’t be that bad! I don’t care either way! In order to truly appreciate the good, you have to appreciate the bad. So let’s jump in and see how long it takes to lose my sanity. This is Tokyo Ghoul.

So first I want to talk about my history with the franchise. I’ve read 5 volumes of the manga. From what I’ve read it’s…okay. Nothing spectacular. And if anyone’s wondering I will also be recapping Tokyo Ghoul √A. If not for me, NO ONE would even be touching this.

We start this episode with a girl feasting on a lovely buffet. A HUMAN buffet! (Brace yourself, I’m doing this for the next 23 weeks). But enough about that, let’s move on to our favorite anime characters: JAPANESE HIGH SCH—wait, they’re in college? Well shit, we’re progressing! Our main character is Ken Kaneki, a worthless dweeb with a black bowl cut and, oh wait I’m describing myself.  THIS guy likes to take chicks out to bookstores!

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Huh. Date seems to be going well.

Everything’s going according to plan. So let’s pull out anime/manga cliché number 254: the girl you wanted to go out with and actually landing a date with wanted to murder you all along!

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Like I said. Date’s going well. Even got a home run!

A cylinder beam sent from the Main Character gods kills da bitch. Ken is injured, severely, in the accident. So doctors decide to perform an organ transplant between the two. I don’t know too much about science, but what I do know is that unless they just so happened to have the EXACT SAME BLOOD TYPE, I find it hard to believe that Kaneki would still be alive because they would have figured out at some point during the transfer that she was a motherfucking ghoul. Or they did and decided to fuck with Kaneki which actually makes a lot of sense in the long run.

So some fuck named Ogura Hisashi sticks his tongue out at Kaneki and it triggers him enough to kickstart a new form of porn: Shakey Food Torture Porn! Yeah, it’s stupid, but so is most anime. Another thing Ken learns is that he may need to get his eyes checked soon.

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So…ghoul’s can’t cry?

So after what will probably be the only decent person in this whole series offers him a bite of his man, he learns that there’s a book he needed to read for Ghoul Class, and the test is today!

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This would be a gif but I don’t have a file today so nevermind!

And after main emo tsundere beats up that guy and shoves a heart down Kaneki’s throat, we end the episode! Oh man, this ain’t going to well. Unlike the manga which is strangely addicting despite it’s terrible tone, this drags everything out! And this is the BEST the show has to offer!
This is gonna be fun.

Final Rating: 5 Shakey Cam Shots out of 10.

 

Tokyo Ghoul can be seen dubbed online on the official [adult swim] website: http://www.adultswim.com/videos/tokyo-ghoul/
If you want to directly support the series, you can buy a Blu-ray right here: https://www.amazon.com/Tokyo-Ghoul-Complete-Season-Blu-ray/dp/B0102AL8V2/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1491100263&sr=1-1&keywords=tokyo+ghoul
Or you can go super-sized and get the Premium boxset: https://www.amazon.com/Tokyo-Ghoul-Complete-Season-Blu-ray/dp/B0102AL0RY/ref=sr_1_3?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1491100263&sr=1-3&keywords=tokyo+ghoul
If you want you can also stream Tokyo Ghoul at any of the links here.

Dubbed or Subbed-

FUNimation: https://www.funimation.com/shows/37172/
Hulu: https://www.hulu.com/tokyo-ghoul

 

Dubbed-

iTunes:  Tokyo Ghoul Season 1
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Tragedy/dp/B015O6OK4G/ref=sr_1_7?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1491100263&sr=1-7&keywords=tokyo+ghoul

Subbed-

iTunes:  Tokyo Ghoul (Original Japanese Version) Tokyo Ghoul (Original Japanese Version)
Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/tv/show/Tokyo_Ghoul_Original_Japanese_Version?id=ZfSwEnEkwbo
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Supper/dp/B00Q4FAEMO/ref=sr_1_10?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1491100263&sr=1-10&keywords=tokyo+ghoul

 

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Leaving this here out of context.
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